There’s nothing at all humorous about dealing with painful hemorrhoids. I needed an alternative to cope with the pain, itching, and embarrassment of this affliction. I was very stressed and that’s when I decided to stop crying and start laughing my way back to mental, emotional and physical health and resorted to the self-help treatment of laughter therapy. I scoured the web for jokes about hemorrhoids to alleviate some of the pain.
Granted, hemorrhoidal humor is actually funnier if you aren’t suffering from hemorrhoids. When you’re suffering inside, being the butt of a joke about your affliction is like adding insult to injury. The brilliant comedy writer Dave Barry relates that a person knows he’s “middle aged” when hemorrhoid jokes stop being funny. However, for those who might actually feel some temporary relief by finding themselves the butt of some hemorrhoid humor and laughing at what is causing them piles of discomfort, here’s a few jokes I found on the web – hope this “laughter therapy” makes you feel better.
· Bumper sticker #1 – If you drive any closer to my butt, you’d be hemorrhoid.
· Bumper sticker #2 – If you’re not hemorrhoid, get off my butt.
· Never confuse hemorrhoid cream with super glue.
· You’ll never find someone with Hemorrhoids playing musical chairs.
· The first man walks into the big box store and the greeter says to him, “Welcome – You’ll find Automotive parts on aisle 9,” to which the shocked customer asks, “How in the world did you know I needed oil for my car?” The Greeter replies, “That’s what my job is.” The next guy enters and the greeter says to him, “Welcome – You can find Sporting Goods down aisle 15.” The second guy, also stunned, asks, “How could you possibly know that I came in looking for an exercise bike?”, To which the Greeter says, “It’s what I do for a living.” Just then a lady comes in and this time the Greeter says to her, “Welcome! You will find tampons on aisle 6.” The woman looks at him in surprise and says to him, “I am not looking for tampons – I came in for Hemorrhoid cream,” and the Greeter says, “Darn! I missed it only by an inch!”
So what exactly is Laughter Therapy? Laughter is truly the best medicine, as the saying goes. laughter therapy is like any other form of aerobic exercise; that is why your stomach sometimes feels sore after a good belly laugh.
When laughing, it is possible that the heart can beat up to 120 times per minute. Laughter has been known to increase blood flow through the veins, your blood pressure tends to lower, and the immune system is boosted. One can get a complete workout of the diaphragm, abdominal, anal, and muscles in the face.
Endorphins are released in the brain during a fit of laughter which are the natural equivalent of pain killers for the body. Endorphins act like opiate drugs to numb pain. Therefore, laughing can be equated to taking morphine or opium but with laughter, one doesn’t get the adverse side effects of the drugs.
Children laugh over 400 times every day, while adults laugh only about 15 times per day? Therefore, if laughter does such good for our outlook on life, why aren’t we laughing more? In March of 1995, a doctor in Bombay, India initiated the very first chapter of the Laughing Clubs International. In only one year, there were 80 clubs throughout India. There are other nations of the world who followed their lead, including several in the United States. Haven’t you heard, laughter is contagious?
The club members gather in the morning at a park before work. In order to get rid of inner inhibitions, they begin their session by repeating, like a mantra, ha-ha, ho-ho and raising their arms over their heads. They proceed to laugh silently with closed mouths, followed by laughing with mouths wide open while not saying a word. Some clubs also combine jogging with laughter. Originally, the sessions began with the telling of jokes but this got stale after about 2 weeks when the number of good jokes was used up and only silliness followed. It became ridiculous and tiring.
Saying that they actually felt better starting the day this way and some members even found that they lost weight as a result. Others find that they are no longer depressed. Another benefit is that going to the sessions helped them to meet other people while just getting them out of the house early in the morning.
Laughter is a strong medicine, and whereas most drugs affect everyone differently, the effect of laughter is always positive. Laughing exercises every part of the body causing the euphoric feeling of eliminated pain. If laughter is such good medicine, good one’s overall health and can alleviate many ills including the pressure on the pain caused by hemorrhoids, why don’t we spend more time laughing?