Anyone who has read the Harry Potter series would agree that Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry is the coolest school in the Universe. But behind the great halls, grand feasts and the interesting coursework and are some not-so-great aspects. Redditors list out the worst parts of being a Hogwarts student.
1. Seriously, Owls?
You know magic but your best communication method with the outside world is f**king owls. [thewid10]
2. Too Many Existential Crises
The existential crisis of having your portrait taken. Like, is that me in there? It has my personality and my memory. And it can move from painting to painting. Is it a clone? Or does my consciousness transfer to the painting and now I’ll be stuck in a two-dimensional world for eternity, unable to escape? This should really bother them more than it does. [DudeWhoSaysWhaaaat]
3. No Privacy
The portraits see everything [Nickynickknack]
And the ghosts. Would be awkward to try to rub one out, and then suddenly Nearly Headless Nick’s dumb ass just shows up. [RedSnapperVeryTasty]
I think that’s the real reason the founders put in the Room of Requirement… Between the common rooms filled with people and shared bath and bedrooms… People need a place to rub one out in private! [NotThatDroid]
And there’s Moaning Myrtle, who seems to enjoy being peeping tom. [Thingamajik]
4. No Safety Standards
The wizarding equivalent of chemical weapons. I mean, a whole class brewing cauldrons of liquid death where a single drop can kill everyone in the room? And some idiot in class is causing nearby explosions?
I’d say the whole complete lack of safety for what amounts to military grade weaponry throughout the school is what blows me away. [massacre3000]
5. No 20th Century Technology
Having to use quills. The novelty might be cool at first, but it must be a pain in the a** if you’re a muggleborn knowing that there are pens and pencils out in the world. [cheribella]
6. The Entire Castle and Grounds
That when you sneak back to the castle drunk on Rosmerta’s mead, there’s a high chance you’ll miss one of the moving staircases and fall a few stories down [_FLDSMDFR]
7. Birds Don’t Poop Eh?
Must be disgusting eating your breakfast in the Great Hall with all those owls flying around, pooping on everything. [Thingamajik]
8. Unfair Rewards System
You defeat a mountain troll? +5 points for you! You’re caught out of bed? F**k you -50 points each. [LadyEmry]
9. Shared Dorms
No sex ed! With those dorms, the teen pregnancy rate would be through the roof. At least college gives you condoms. [xxruruxx]
10. Dangerous Potions and Spells
The fact that love potions are essentially a date rape drug. [UncleRico1]
Imperius curse, polyjuice potion, memory charm, love potion… so many ways to rape someone, or worse… [elsjpq]
11. No Sport but Quidditch
The only sport is Quidditch?
What if I want to compete in sports, but i’m not really talented enough to play Quidditch?
Can’t we invent some other magical sports too? [RedSnapperVeryTasty]
12. When Even Quidditch Messes with You
Being up 14 goals and the opponent’s seeker accidentally swallows the snitch. [OrgasmickJagger]