If you are the type of person who has a problem getting over someone, you’re not alone and there is NOTHING wrong with you. Of course, that does not make the process any easier. Whether you are trying to get over someone because your love for them is not reciprocated or because you broke up, it can be a very hard and long process.
Of course, the first thing I would suggest (but I will write what to do if you can’t do this ‘first thing’) is to go to a good therapist. I had suffered for a long time trying to get over someone and I just couldn’t do it. At some point, I decided that I needed help. It was the best decision I ever made! It took 2 sessions and I was complete, permanently over this person. I wished I had gone sooner! Otherwise, you run the risk to confuse this painful situation with ‘love’ itself, which is absolutely not true.
However, if therapy is not a choice for you, I would take the following steps:
1 – I would constantly concentrate on the fact that you deserve someone who truly loves you and has no problem showing you in many ways, consistently and constructively. 2 – I would begin to imagine what it will feel like when you finally meet someone who loves you completely. Then, remember that you deserve that! 3 – I would remember that love only loves when it’s MUTUAL. Otherwise, it’s projection, idealization, displacement etc, but not love. 4 – I would remember the faster you get over him or her, the faster your heart will be open to a new, better love
The key to get over someone is in understanding the ‘falling in love’ process, because once you accept and understand your feelings as well as why the other person is not loving you back as you want, it will be much easier to get over painful love, a breakup, a divorce or simply unrequited love. The pages Falling in Love explains all of this, as well as explaining the pitfalls and the misconceptions often leading to painful, fake love, so that next time your heart won’t be broken.