If Dogs Had 911

Redditors imagine what 'dog emergencies' would look like

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Man’s furry, adorable best friend has a different idea of what an emergency would entail. Redditors imagine what a 911 emergency service hotline for dogs would look like.

It is advisable to read this in a panic-stricken, gravelly voice, somewhat like Scooby-Doo.

1. HELP!

I can’t seem to reach my bone – I pushed it under the radiator. [MzanziInUSA]

2. HUMANS IN POOL

K911: K-911 what is your emergency?

CORGI: MY HUMAN IS IN THE POOL THERE IS SO MUCH SPLASHING OH GOD THEY’RE DYING WHY WON’T THEY GET OUT?!?!

K911: DEAR DOG, WHAT WERE THEY THINKING?! (stressed out panting sounds) Have you tried barking at them?

CORGI: I BARKED AT THEM AND BIT THE WATER BUT THEY WON’T GET OUT!

K911: Run around the pool until your paws bleed!

CORGI: I WILL DO THAT NOW!

K911: Are they getting out?

CORGI: OMG YES THEY ARE! YOU ARE MY HERO!

K911: All in a day’s work! [EpitomyofShyness]

2. DEER IN BACKYARD

“Hello 911, yes, there is a deer in my backyard, I am trapped inside, and THE HUMANS ARE NOT TAKING THE THREAT SERIOUSLY!!” [motheroflulu]

3. STALKER

This guy comes to our house every day during the week. Always around 10 a.m. He puts something in the front door, then walks away. I think I’m being stalked. [NextSoulTaken]

4. THERE’S ANOTHER DOG IN THAT CAR! [necromundus]

5. WHERE IS SHE?

My owner left. It’s been half an hour. I mean a whole hour! SHE’S BEEN GONE ALL DAY WHERE IS SHE? [writergirljds]

6. MY TAIL

I’m being followed by my tail!

I caught my tail!

Someone is biting me! [pinko_zinko]

7. ALERT THE NEIGHBOURS

SOMEBODY PARKED MY NEIGHBOR’S CAR AT MY NEIGHBOR’S HOUSE!!!!!!!! AND NOW THEY’RE GOINGINTOMYNEIGHBOR’SHOUSE!!!!!! [TooGoodForSauce]

8. I NEED MY BALL

My ball fell under the couch and my master isn’t home! What do? [Krutaun]

9. PEOPLE ARE OUTSIDE

Dog 911: What’s your emergency

Dog: There’s people outside my house!

Dog 911: M’am, calm down, are they trying to get in?

Dog: No, but they’re outside my house!

Dog 911: Are they on your property?

Dog: No, but I can see them! How are you not as upset as I am? [Buwaro]

10. HUMAN DOESN’T POOP

“MY HUMAN DOESN’T POOP but he collects my poop in a bag! Help him please! I can’t poop enough for us both! I am worried.” [KlaymondreMcCurrant]

11. DOORBELL RANG

Dog: The doorbell rang!

911: Does it smell like someone you know?

Dog: It doesn’t matter! The doorbell rang. I barked to make it stop!

911: Did it stop?

Dog: No, it rang again! You better send back up. [TheConsumer]

12. IMPOSTOR!

“Help! There’s someone in the house and they keep doing the exact same things I’m doing, but reversed! They also look just like me!” [TheBreastIncarnate]

13. HELP ME QUICK!

I tore up my owner’s shoe, help me hide it before they come home. [Fuckyeahrobin]

14. SEND BACK UP!

911: 911, what’s your emergency?

My Chihuahua: The neighbors that have been living next to us ever since I’ve been alive came home again today! I tried yapping at the door for 15 minutes even after they went inside, but my human won’t let me out to scare them away! Send taller dogs for back up! I can only reach their ankles! [Alcubierre’

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