Guys Who Just Couldn’t Get the Hint

These girls couldn't have been clearer about wanting sex but these guys were clueless


Guys are always complaining that girls never make the first move. But when girls do, they go blank. Guys list out the biggest ‘come hither’ looks they’ve missed out on from girls.

1. Very good

Via text

Girl: Are you going to that party?

Me: Yeah for a little bit. Probably gonna be boring.

Girl: Yeah…was thinking of just staying in.

Me: Probably a good plan.

Girl: So yeah…I’ll just be here tonight. Roommates are gone.

Me: Sounds nice; my roommates never leave.

Girl: Ok. So. I’ll be here all alone in my apartment. If the party sucks.

Me: Very good.

2. No Wine, Thank You

When she insisted on bringing a bottle of wine from her restaurant back to my place. When I said no, she then said, well then can I come over without the bottle of wine. [OnStandardBasis]

3. Hmm.. Nice

Hanging out with a coworker at her apartment, each 19/20ish. Sitting on the couch side by side, she complained that her large breasts were a pain to deal with because of their size, followed by”…do you want to touch them?”

I sort of half-juggled them (as though I was comparing the weight involved) and said “hmm, nice.”

Not the only signal I missed that night, but probably my defining moment of obvious failure. [Thoughtful_dumbass]

4. A True Gentleman

We were seeing a movie together and she said she was cold. I said “yeah it’s pretty chilly” and did nothing. Later she said it again, pretty obvious what she wanted. I proceeded to give her my jacket to put around her. I’m a practical man. [kroople]

5. Sorry, Ynez

A lifetime ago in high school the extremely cute exchange student from Spain sort of cornered me and started asking questions about an upcoming school dance. What is it like? Is it fun? Are you going with anyone?

Ynez, if you’re out there, I’m sorry. I’m a dope. [NowWatchMeNayNay]

6. Nah, I Can Go Home

Drove every week to see a girl I had a crush on. Still lived with her parents, so I never stayed the night.

She always was flirty, but “then me” was oblivious. When I stayed later than usual one night, and I yawned, she said, “You should just stay the night and we can get a hotel room.”

I said. “Nah, I’m good to drive, I’ll make it.” She said, “No, don’t be silly. We can hang out tonight.”

I was halfway home when I realized what she meant. [WesbroBaptstBarNGril ]

7. You See, I Like Closeness

“So what do you like in a girl, sexually”

“I guess what’s important to me is a friendship like closeness”. [notmyworkcomputer]

8. You Clueless B***ard

A girl I’d been chatting with for a while asked to come back to my hotel room to see my music collection on my laptop.

So I took her back and showed her my music collection for 30 minutes. That’s not a euphemism, I literally did that until she took pity on how clueless I was and basically jumped me. [Kilen13]

9. Nah, I Don’t Want a Taste

Watching TV in my living room at roughly 2am, in the dark

Her: Applying strawberry lip gloss.

Me: Why are you putting on lip gloss?

Her: Strawberry lip gloss tastes so nice.

Me: Haha you’re weird

Her: Want to taste?

Me: Nah I already know what it tastes like

Commence several years of late night self loathing and regret. [LordCande]

10. Football Rules!

Invited me over to watch a movie as the parents were out that night, I chose to go to my rec soccer game. [mr_malhotra]

11. The Nightcap

Went on a date with a girl and she asked if I wanted to come back to hers and stay over. I thought it was perfect as I had work in the morning and she lived right around the corner. I literally got into her bed, said good night, turned over and went to sleep. About a year later something reminded me of that night and the penny dropped. [thekungfupanda]

12. I Don’t Like Coffee

Girl invited me upstairs for coffee after a date. I replied with something very similar to:

” No thanks, I don’t like coffee. It keeps me up.”

It wasn’t until I was watching Seinfeld later that I realized I have the dating skills of George Costanza. [timmyt3333]

13. The Private Study Group

In class a girl asked if we could study together for a minor quiz at her place.

A friend overhears and asks if he can join us, I say yes immediately before she can say anything.

She sends us her address and a time. I show up and she answers the door in a bikini. Nobody else at her place. She says she was sunbathing and asks me into her room while she changes. I look away to be polite and then make small talk once she’s done.

My friend shows up 30 minutes later, turns out she told him that the study group started 30 minutes after what she told me.

Sigh… [DeliciousBlueBerries]

14. “Sure” (You Idiot!)

One of the bustiest, beautiful and smartest girls I’ve met in my life leans up against a nearby car and tells me “You should ask me out.”

Socially-Inept-17-y/o-Rex: “Sure.”

Never did. Only after she started acting angry at me did I realize she had a crush on me the whole time. [Aerexil]

15. BURN!

Me: “I really wanna try to sleep with a tall girl, see how it’s like.”

Attractive Girl: “Well, I’m 6 feet 2” (I’m about 5 feet 8)

Me: “Nah, I was thinking about 7 feet tall”

Still haunts me. [catbro89]