Think about it. Facebook is one of the most popular – and powerful – methods of communication in most people’s lives today. So why shouldn’t it be an effective tool for getting your ex back? If social networking is an important part of your life, why don’t you use Facebook to get your ex back?
People can’t resist checking out the Facebook pages of everybody they know. And when you’ve just broken up, you can be sure that both partners are keeping an eye on each other through Facebook.
The reason is simple: you both want to know how the other is dealing with the breakup.
If you’ve been following the No Contact rule, then you’ll understand some of the reasons why it can be so effective to use Facebook to get your ex back. You’ll know how important is it to project the right image to the world – and to your ex. You want them to know that you are not a heartbroken wreck, falling apart with misery because they have left you, and unable to cope with your life alone.
Instead you can show them a person who is moving on with their life, and coping well with the breakup. When your ex sees you going out, making new friends, getting on at work and building a new life, they will be surprised, confused and even affronted that you have moved on so quickly.
You will look like a winner, someone with great social value whom they have been a fool to lose. You will look like someone they would be happy to date. You will look like someone they wish they could have back in their life.
The Importance of Social Value
Everybody wants a winner. Nobody wants a loser. And you can use Facebook to get your ex back by projecting all these positive, desirable, winning qualities through your Facebook page.
But you need to disguise your intentions if you are going to succeed. Any hint that you would use Facebook to get your ex back will fail if it becomes obvious to them. You must show them what they are missing without making it look as if you are thinking about them at all.
This means not updating your page umpteen times a day, or constantly posting things on your ex’s wall. But the most important rule of all is don’t unfriend them.
Of course, it’s a temptation, and you probably feel so hurt and angry that you really want to unfriend them, just to show them how little they matter to you now. But it would be a big mistake.
You need them to be able to see your Facebook page. And you want to it to look as if you are rising above your breakup.
Changing Your Relationship Status
You will probably be tempted to change your relationship status too, just as you thought about unfriending your ex. But when you update your relationship status, everyone is notified, which will draw attention to you for all the wrong reasons. Your friends will start posting on your wall asking questions, and you will end up discussing your breakup in public – and looking needy and attention-seeking in the process.
All of this is bad news. So leave your relationship status unchanged for a week or two.
When you do change your relationship status, don’t change it to “it’s complicated”. This will make it clear to your ex that you have hopes of getting back together, which is a fatal mistake when you use Facebook to get your ex back.
The best thing to do is to remove it completely from your Facebook page. This will make you look more mysterious than desperate, which is definitely a good thing.
Change Your Profile Picture
Unlike your relationship status, your profile picture is something you must think about changing fairly quickly.
At any moment your profile picture says a lot about you, so after breaking up with someone it’s important to make sure that yours is sending the right message. Whatever your current one is like, and no matter how proud of it you are; you need to change it.
Putting up a new profile picture is essential when you want to use Facebook to get your ex back.
You want to make a powerful statement about yourself, and a picture can paint a thousand words. It must be a new picture that your ex has never seen, as you want to make it clear that your life hasn’t ended with your breakup.
And it goes without saying that you need to be looking GREAT in it!
Keep Your Photo Album Buzzing
Think about the things you used to enjoy together, especially if your relationship took a nose dive in the fun department at the end. Take pictures whenever you go out, post them on your wall and get your friends to do the same. You don’t want it to look as if you are trying to send a message to your ex, but you do want them to see you enjoying yourself, and especially to see you doing things they enjoy too.
But don’t tag yourself in any of these photos: get your friends to do it instead. Your ex will notice all the pictures where you are tagged, and see that you are out enjoying yourself with an active social circle.
Make sure that you are pictured in mixed social groups too. Your want your ex to know that you have other options besides them. There is nothing like the fear of loss to re-awaken desire.
Add New Friends
Some of the people in these pictures should become your friends. It adds credibility to the pictures, increases your social value and will get under your ex’s skin.
Most people who dump someone have an arrogant assumption that they could easily get that person back if they really wanted to. This is the first idea you have to scupper if you want to get your ex back. Every member of the opposite sex you know is a possible new boyfriend or girlfriend, at least as far as your ex is concerned.
So start expanding your social circle right away!
Your Facebook Wall
Use your wall to post things about your new life and your expanding interests. Your wall should complement your photo album and give some intriguing details about the new kick-ass life you are leading.
Try to get your friends to join in with their comments, and encourage them to tag you in all their pictures (but resist the urge to tag yourself). The more engaged you are with other people, the better your image will be and the more powerful will be the social value that you are projecting to your ex.
If they think you could be snapped up by someone new at any moment, it will really focus their mind on whether they want to risk losing you for good.
How to Use Facebook to Get Your Ex Back
Desire is the most effective way to use Facebook to get your ex back, sprinkled with a healthy amount of fear. Arouse your ex’s desire through the subtle use of memories and the promise of better things to come. Use your photo album and your wall judiciously to create these effects.
Then add in some fear that you could move on to the point where it would be impossible for them to get you back.
Remember that what you see on someone’s Facebook page is powerfully persuasive and convincing. Paint the picture you want them to see there, and they will believe it.