All of us have done it. Or have thought about it. Or have come really close to doing it but then came to our senses. Yup, I am talking about texting exes when you are in a really contemplative mood or are really drunk.
Sean Peter Drohan, a Princeton graduate, used to be one of those people. Until February 14, 2017. That was the day he started a Google spreadsheet called ‘texts i wanna send my ex’.
“I had the idea on Valentine’s Day. I was with a friend, and I turned to her and said, “Is this funny?” and she said, “definitely.” So I made it right there as we ate lunch. It could hardly have been more casual,” says Drohan.
Within hours of putting it up, 2,500 people had uploaded messages on it. The number has kept growing. Why did he use a spreadsheet instead of say, a Facebook page? A major reason he says is anonymity.
“There’s also something fun and subversive about using something that’s, like, a business tool for such personal reasons,” says Drohan.
Some texts on the sheet are apologies: “sorry i handled the breakup really badly and i wish you didn’t hate me”.
Some are bitter: “You literally told me you’d have no qualms about murdering me and now you’re confused about why I don’t even want to be friends with you?? What the fuck dude. Enjoy your shitty life.”
And some try to explain the reasons for the break-up: “Trust me, if we had gotten married it would have ended in divorce anyways. I was trying to save us from something a whole lot worse by ending it before you proposed.”
We chose nine of our favourites and here they are:
Number 10 on the list is actually Drohan’s favourite. Obviously, we had to ask him if he went down memory lane and what’s been the worst or best text he’s sent an ex. “I did once open a text message to an awful ex with, ‘Don’t bullshit me. I’m a lot smarter than you are.’ That felt pretty good,” says Drohan.
Some texters have gotten back to Drohan. They say the spreadsheet has helped them find peace, or work out some issues, or even reach out to an ex that they needed to talk to.
So the next time you feel the need to text your ex, head over to the spreadsheet. You won’t regret it the next morning.